Scientists studying Nutters in a Liverpool Loony bin have discovered scientific information which will shock the world as we know it!
It seems the main cause for Scouse “Madness” is having Gerry and The Pacemakers abhorrent song, “You’ll Never Walk Alone” blasted in their ears 24/7 after Liverpool FC lose yet again!
However, on a more serious note (if possible), they also went to a Manchester Loony Bin and discovered most inmates were quite ‘sane’, actually, compared to Westminster/Washington/Moscow, not Angie, Nutters, who decide in which direction our planet should evolve.
Professor Jonathan Slagged-One (no relation), leading the study was bowled over after most declared as insane inmates offered far better directives than those who are elected to ruin our planet, and here are just a few:
A) Johnson’s a tosser, let Jaggedone take over the country! Ear, Ear, Old Bean!
B) Trump is a wanker, let Kanye West run America, at least he’s not a tranny!
C) Mummify Angie Merkel because being a ‘Mummy der Nation’ is much better than having a Bavarian, Knickerbockered Nazi running Germany!
D) Build a wall around Africa, give the poor buggars enough money, food, and decent hygiene, and they will stop committing suicide in mini-boats swept away in the Mediterranean! After the wall has been built, spike the heads of corrupt bastard leaders of African nations, put them on watchtowers as a ‘costly’ reminder who really is fucking mad!
E) Extend and raise the Chinese Wall to stop Kim Jong Un peeping over it. In addition, it will stop the Chinese exporting their most infamous export article, Covid19!
F) Reincarnate Pablo Escobar who will stop the shit going down in Middle America! Insane Americans topped the wrong guy!
G) Make marijuana legal all over the planet because being stoned out of one’s brains is much better than putting up with the Kardashians!
So, you ‘sane’ mob out there who keep the ‘global insane circus’ going, take a bit of R & R in your local loony bin and learn how fucking ‘Mad’ we outside really all are!
PS: A white van has just screeched in front of Jaggedone’s country abode, and he already has his made-to-measure straitjacket on!