THE ENGLISH CHANNEL – (Satire News) – In a story that is currently developing, England’s Ta Ta For Now News reports that a British cruise ship, The Sarah Ferguson, has been hijacked by Costa Rican pirates.
Word filtering out of the majestically luxurious 917-foot long cruise ship is that 17 pirates boarded the ship as it was sailing in the English Channel at around 3:42 am, Moscow time.
The Costa Rican pirates, who spoke no English, forced one of the ship’s pastry cooks, who they learned was from Caracas, Venezuela, to translate their demands.
The pirates who call themselves Los Piratas de la Costa Rica, demanded that the cruise ship line give them $70,000 in Costa Rican money, access to the ship’s 8 swimming pools, and 17 servings of banana sushi.
In Other News. Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene is denying reports that she has a second degree yeast infection that somehow has spread to her tonsils.