HOLLYWOOD – (Satire News) – Britney Spears recently sat down with Scuttlebutt Review reporter April Jiggle at a local Jack-in-the-Box in West Holly.
Spears told Miss Jiggle that she has just signed a $6.6 million contract to be the official spokesperson for Corona Extra Beer.
Britney added that the past year has been unbelievably hectic, stressful, and it has caused her vagina to feel like it’s sitting in the next room.
She said that she cannot believe how her own father could treat her like Trump treated the NFL black football players with total disdain, hatred, and malice, just because they chose to kneel.
Britney did point out that things are looking really good for her. She noted that in early 2022, she will be co-starring with Matthew McConaughey, Sofia Vergara, and Tom Brady in the Tri-Moon Motion Picture Company film “The Vitriolic Vagina Viewing Vampires of Vancouver.”
SIDENOTE: The movie will be filmed in Galveston, Texas, because Galveston greatly resembles Vancouver, Canada.