NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – The NFL has just announced that the half-time performers at the 2022 Super Bowl, which will be held at SoFi Stadium in Inglewood, California, will be British singer Adele and the British rock group, The Raging Female Hormones Band.
Sports Bet Gazette writer Zorro La Bamba stated that he was quite surprised that both acts are from the United Kingdom. Adele is from Tottenham and the Raging Female Hormones Band are from Manchester.
La Bamba noted that several US performers are upset, but as NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell commented, “They can all just build a bridge and get over it”
Other performers such as Elton John, Duran Duran, The Moody Blues, Pink Floyd, and The Rolling Stones are all thrilled beyond belief.
[EDITOR’S NOTE: Interestingly enoughALL of the above singers and bands hail from the UK.]
Goodell stated that Super Bowl 51 will be televised in 191 of the world’s 192 countries, and it will sponsored by Coca Cola, Pepsi Cola, Dos Equis Beer, McDonalds, El Matador Tequila, and Hercules Brand Condoms.
Adele, who has lost lots and lots of weight, and actually looks sexy-as-hell, and deliciously delicious, says that she will be performing a medley of her hits dressed in a skimpy “NFL Rocks” tank top and tight-fitting Daisy Duke short shorts.
Meanwhile, The Raging Female Hormones said that they wanted to perform totally naked but Goodell nixed the idea.
[PUBLISHER’S NOTE: DAMMIT!.]