Tuesday, 21 December 2021
FARGO, North Dakota – (Satire News) – The North Dakota Senate voted 77 to 23 to change the name that has been in existence for 132 years.
State historian Burgess Biscuit, 63, stated that the state was originally named Upper Dakota, but it was changed in 1889, to appease the Ogalala Sioux, who once owned the entire state, but sold it for $27.80 to a gold prospector from Brooklyn.
Biscuit noted that the name Upper Dakota means “Land where you really have to watch where you step because there is buffalo shit all over the damn place.”
The state’s treasurer Grisston Van Sand pointed out that a Quinnipinni Poll showed that 87.9% of the state’s residents don’t give a rat’s ass if the name is changed or not, just as long as the state taxes are not increased and the price of beer stays the same. ■