Wednesday, 5 January 2022
LONDON – (Satire News) – A close friend of Ivanka Trump has informed London’s Tickety Boo News Agency that her daddy, aka The Predatorial Perv, is seriously thinking about leaving America and moving to the United Kingdom.
TBNA reporter Neville Twickenbuck says that the Trumptard is scared-as-hell that he will soon be fitted for an orange prison jumpsuit, be tossed into prison, and become LeRoy, Willie, or LaFrons bitch slave.
The Twickster, as Prince Charles and Simon Cowell call Neville, noted that her majesty, the Queen has already made it abundantly clear to Prime Minister Boris Johnson, that if he allows old “Nazi Boy,” (Trump) to set even one of his toddler toes in the UK, she will move to have him (BJ) impeached quicker than he can say “tits.”
Meanwhile, Melania is reportedly having the time of her life, cavorting with NBA super star LeBron James, all over the Plywood State (Florida).