Modern dating can be so tough! You meet a great guy on Hinge, or via a mysterious caller-ID-less phone call, but then he shows signs of pulling away. Is he really moving on or is he just slashing teens at Woodsboro High?
Take this quiz to find out once and for all if he’s truly ghosting you or if he’s just Ghostface from the Scream franchise!
Communication is key in any new relationship. How does he usually contact you?
- He rarely messages me anymore… Unless it’s a Venmo request to pay for the gas it took to drive to my house.
- He loves late-night, steamy phone calls when I’m home alone. I always tell him to quit it with the phone calls because it’s such a boomer move but he just loves hearing my voice!
When you talk on the phone, who hangs up first?
- We don’t talk on the phone anymore. But he does still contact me via 3 a.m. Snapchats.
- He never wants to hang up. In fact, when I even hint I have to go he says the cutest things to get me to stay like, “You Hang Up On Me Again, I’ll Gut You Like A Fish.”
Does he try to get to know you by asking about your hobbies and interests?
- Not really. He mostly talks about what he likes: Bitcoin, NFTs, dating other women.
- Yes! He asks me what my favorite scary movie is all the time. I just know he’s planning a romantic movie date night!
A lot can be said about a man by how he dresses on your dates. Does he put effort into his appearance when you’re together?
- It’s mostly cargo shorts and graphic tees…
- I’ve never been with a man who’s soo intentional about his aesthetic! His head-to-toe, tailored black cloak makes him look tall, dark, and handsome. Not to mention he’s a COVID-conscious king and always adheres to mask mandates.
Does he try to get to know your friends and family?
- He was texting through most of brunch with my friends, but I’m sure he was just really busy at work!
- OMG he’s so eager! He’s always telling me he’d kill to meet more of my loved ones! Even better, my BFF simply died swooning over him.
Oftentimes it’s best to be direct with the men in your life. What does he say when you ask him what he wants?
- He stammers a lot when I ask and doesn’t make much eye contact.
- Ooh, I asked him this last night and it got a little dirty… I’m blushing… He said he wanted to “see what my insides looked like.”
Pay attention to your intuition, girlfriend! How do you feel when you’re around him?
- Honestly, I’m a little anxious. It always seems like he’s checking his watch, ready to leave early.
- I feel like I’ve known him forever! To me, he just feels like he could be my boyfriend, or my boyfriend’s best friend, or my boyfriend’s jealous mother, or a classmate obsessed with the movies based on my boyfriend, or a long lost half brother, or a niece, or a niece’s boyfriend… Well, you get the picture.
Mostly As: I know this is hard to hear, but he’s definitely ghosting you, bestie.
Mostly Bs: Good news! You’re not being ghosted! Your man is simply Ghostface from the Scream franchise! Sure, he might take some time away to stalk his ex, and he sometimes calls other girls, but he’ll always find his way back to you in the end. Want our advice? Never break up with this gem, or you might end up full of regret and totally gutted.
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