LONDON – (Satire News) Prime Minister Boris Johnson has just informed the people of Great Britain that parliament has voted to change the colors of the English flag.
The red, white, and blue color scheme was first implemented back on Wednesday, September 16, 1606, by a seamstress/sorceress named Betsy Rosenshire, who at the time was 102, but actually looked 92.
She sewed the first Union Jack flag made from corn shucks, moose hide, and discarded ladies bloomers.
And now after 416 years of the English flag flying over everything from Buckingham Palace to the Tower Big Ben, and Wembley Stadium to most McDonalds, the Union Jack will be getting a make over.
Parliament has voted overwhelmingly to change the Brit flag colors from red, white, and navy blue, to yellow and royal blue in honor of the colors of the Ukrainian flag.
Meanwhile, Piers Morgan has issued an official complaint, but Prince Charles reportedly told Morgy to shut his bloomin’, blithering, blimey, bastard mouth, or else he will have his arrogantly pompous ass exiled to the darkest jungles of Zimbabwe.