TALLAHASSEE, Florida – (Satire News) – Reports from several reputable news agencies including BuzzFuzz, Boom Boom News, and The Cloud 9 News Agency all agree that the days of the arrogant, sarcastic, labia majora-faced governor Ron DeSantis are numbered.
The Plywood State governor has made more mean, heartless, cruel decisions than Trumptard’s hero Adolf Hitler did back in World War II.
DeSantis says that the reason he is such an asshole is due to heredatorial genes. He pointed out that his grandfather on his father’s side Roscoe “Bubba” DeSantis, was such an asshole, that his high school teachers nicknamed him “Rectum Roscoe.”
He then noted that one of his aunt’s Charlene Peticia Kickatoon, was so fucking ugly and so fucking ornery that she made crocodile vomit look pretty.
SIDENOTE: Fox News resident varmint Greg Gutfeld stated that he truly believes that DeSantis will be impeached real damn soon, if not sooner.