MOSCOW – (Satire News) – Valdimir Nikita Putin says he is not going to let McDonalds get the best of him, so he has decided to re-open seven of the McDonalds that Mickey D’s shut down, and he will soon open up every single one of the 859 McDonalds that were shut down.
Putin says that he will rename the fast food franchise restaurants McDonaldski’s.
He added that he will keep the Ronald McDonald figure whom he is renaming Ronaldchev McDonaldski.
McDonald’s home office in Cicero, Illinois says that the midget Russian prick cannot do that as it infringes on the Mickey D’s registration and copyright law.
Meanwhile, Putin the evil SOB from the depts of hellacious hell replied, “Looky here my American comrades, I am Vladimir Nikita Putin, do you really think for one belligerent second that I give an aardvark’s ass what anyone thinks?”