Among the countless Brexit benefits already identified by Mr Rees-Mogg, he is proposing a bill be put before parliament that would ban shops and supermarkets from using barcode technology and return to good old-fashioned British price labels.
Mr Rees-Mogg explained that his personal success with fiddling hedge funds came partly from his pleasure as a child, in mentally adding up the cost of the shopping in his nanny’s trolley as she placed it on the conveyor in Harrods food hall.
‘I could tell her to the exact farthing what her shopping would cost and any discrepancy with my calculation and what was demanded of her by the servant at the till, would obviously be due to fraud. Whereupon the store manager would call security and insist the till slave was whipped to within an inch of her life and denied gruel until she begged for forgiveness and promised to be trustworthy on fear that if happened again, the graves of her dead children would be sent to Rwanda, or some other God-forsaken hell hole like Glastonbury.’
We asked whether Mr Rees-Mogg had used the self-checkout systems that supermarkets now have, to which he replied, ‘Good Heavens no! A trip to a supermarket would be over as soon as you walked in, with those ridiculous EU-inspired things. A supermarket trip surely needs to allow sufficient time in the checkout queue to have at least a three-course picnic.’
